Sex (done well) is great. You know it, I know it, you may not wanna think about it, but your mum and dad know it… and that’s why you’re here on earth, reading this article (I’m so sorry).
It’s not always candles and romance or with someone you’re in a committed relationship with, but just remember that before you climb between the sheets, in the back of a car, on the kitchen worktop or do that precarious, will I, won’t I slip in the shower sex, make sure its safe sex for the both of you.
Birth Control Before Bros
If you’re sexually active and aren’t actively looking to get pregnant, then birth control should be your BFF. Long gone are the days when you should be depending on him to have an “in emergencies” condom in his wallet and as responsible women, it’s something we should already have covered. Birth control isn’t just about the pill. Monthly injections, implants, patches, caps and IUDs are all options available for you via your GP or family planning clinic. Not sure which is best for you? Talk about it. With your doctor, your friends, research it on the internet and if your chosen birth control doesn’t suit you (causes dizziness, makes you wanna jump in the sack less or turns you into a raging bitch) then don’t be afraid to speak up and ensure that its working for you.
What I mean by that is, there’s no use taking the daily pill if you have a brain like a sieve, you forget to take it and you’re forever playing catch up, it’s probably an indicator that you should switch to something with less responsibility like a monthly injection or the implant.
Wrap it Up Before You…
Just cos you’re packing a body full or hormones to stop you getting pregnant it doesn’t mean you’re protected. Yep, you’re pretty much protected (bar the couple of %) from getting up the duff by one-night-stand Steve but sperm isn’t the only thing he might be packing in his pants. You can’t go wrong if you protect your dong. Well, his dong. One of the only ways to effectively protect yourself against an STI is to wrap it up, before… you know where that’s going. Using latex condoms every time you have sex, for the entire sex act with a water based lubricant is the most effective form of protection against STIs such as preventing transmission of HIV, hepatitis B, hepatitis C, syphilis, gonorrhoea, and chlamydia. If he refuses to wear a condom because it “doesn’t feel as good” or whatever other excuses he throws at you so that he can go bareback, remind him of how it doesn’t feel particularly good to a) fall pregnant when all you wanted was to itch a scratch or b) have your genitals burn when you pee.
Vaginal sex is the only way that you can get pregnant, that’s true. But skipping the V and hopping straight to anal or oral sex because it’s not gonna culminate in a kiddo or is “safer” isn’t the best decicion you’re ever gonna make. Newsflash, you can still contract STIs from a cheeky back-door visit or some below belt lip service. If you fail to protect yourself, well, you know the rest.
Pulling Out Is Dumb
Like to live on the edge? Well, pulling out as an alternative to wearing a condom or adopting an hormonal birth control method is dumb, not scintillating. He may not have, how shall we say…. emptied his load inside you, but the pre ejaculte that occurs during sex still contains sperm powerful enough to knock you up. Not to mention, if his sperm is deposited right outside your vagina, those Olympic style swimmers can still make their up there and cause pregnancy.
Golden Showers (Kinda)
Ever found yourself on the toilet in the middle of the night whilst he snores away? *raises hand* UTI’s (urinary tract infection) can occur when your bladder (which is located at the top of your uterus) is irritated during intercourse. Yep, even your bladder gets irritated by men. The best way to prevent it? Always make sure you pee after sex to get rid of any bacteria that has accumulated in your urethra. It saves you from a midnight burning pee or having to sit in a shallow bath of cold water.
Check It (& Yourself) Out
Sitting legs akimbo in your local GUM clinic does not sound like the idea of a fabulous Wednesday afternoon, but if you are sexually active or have been in the past, it’s important you get yourself checked out regularly just to ensure there’s no nasty surprises. Especially as there are a few STIs that condoms won’t protect against such as HPV, herpes and syphilis. Some diseases can be a bit like those under the skin spots that lurk for weeks before coming to a head meaning that you can be infected but not know it until weeks, months or even years down the line unless you get checked. Pretty gross to think you could be carrying that around with you, eh? Grosser still, imagine finding out and having to contact anyone and everyone you’ve ever slept with just to let them know you tested positive for an STI because you aren’t sure when you got it or who gave it to you. Some STDs, if left untreated for too long, can lead to infertility so even if motherhood isn’t on your mind right now, looking after your sexual health will mean that should the time arise, you’re not in for any nasty surprises.
Also… wouldn’t you wanna know who infected you without having to construct a sexual timeline? STI tests are pretty similar to smear tests in that, the thought of them is terrifying, the reality? It’s all over in a couple of minutes (much like several of the men I’ve slept with).
Open Up Before You Open Your Legs
This one is maybe the most simple and obvious of them all:
Be open and honest about your sexual past and feel comfortable enough to ask whoever you’re having sex with for their sexual history. You don’t need to know who who they lost their virginity to or specifics of their sex life with their ex, but being comfortable enough to discuss best protection practise is key.
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