She Wants To Be Me

One of my favoutite things about Twitter is when people who I follow start indirect tweeting, especially to eachother.  I have numerous couples on my timeline and its easy to establish when all is not well in paradise.  I know it sounds bad and as though I’m taking misery in other peoples pain, but everybody loves a good “some people” tweet, and I’m no exception to this rule.  Show me a “some people” tweet and I’ll pull on my hoody, grab a bowl of popcorn and tune in to watch the fireworks begin to fly (that’s what I’m doing most nights with a face full of Sudocrem).  There’s only one thing more entertaining than a “some people” tweeter, and thats a girl who’s got a crush on a guy and spreads the love all over her timeline… “indirectly” (of course).

I saw a few tweets on m timeline today that made me laugh.  Not just a smirk, like seriously laugh, belly laugh (!), it also made me cringe to the 100th degree and also made me think about how stupidly some women will bend when it comes to a guy that they like.  I’m not averse to a couple of indirect tweets, if you’re going to say that you’ve never done it before, you may aswell have a nose the size of a whales penis, because you’re lying (unless you don’t use Twitter, in that case GOOD FOR YOU).  Introduce a man into a womans life, and it’s as though the woman loses her identity completely.  She becomes this moulded version of what she thinks that guy wants in a girlfriend.  She has blonde hair, he likes brown – she dyes it.  He’s a veggie, he eats meat, she’s eating a good ribeye.  She listens to Justin Bieber, he listens to Metallica and Slipknot – she’s making the \m/ sign in all of her selfies and wearing black alot.  It reminds me of the sister in 27 Dresses – she concocts this completely different version of herself based entirely on the likes and dislikes of one guy.  She indirectly tweets throught the day in reply to what he’s tweeted, she replies to ever single tweet he sends, she retweets his tweets.  Her timeline is flooded with the ramblings of a schizophrenic person relied heavily on what is happening in this (obviously stormy) relationship.  But she doesn’t just do this for one guy, she does it for all of them – she’s a freaking relationship chameleon and doesn’t even know who she is anymore.  The funny thing is is that you can see where the infatuation begins, there’s a shift in the tone of a persons tweets which is almost imperceptable to everybody but somebody who’s been there before… I’ve done this before, but I was a naive teenager and this was all done via Myspace or MSN.  At the ripe old age of 26 I’m wise enough to know that you should never change yourself just to fit another persons ideal.

There’s going to be no deep psychological evaluation of this, why does she do it?  What does it gain?  Does it work?  Or does the man notice and run a million miles?  This is purely an observational piece.  I had a “Reasons Why I wouldn’t Want to be a Man” post all ready to go, but after asking a question about men & women on Twitter earlier and being accused of being “Man-Ist” (is that even a THING?) I thought I’d poke a bit of fun at us ladies (don’t all go getting defensive, I’m not talking about you all!)

(This whole piece reminds me of a song (doesn’t it always) from Busted (ah, the good old days of Busted) called “She Wants to Be Me” – remember that?)

  • Jemma

    Not gonna lie, I was singing Busted’s She Wants to Be Me throughout this whole post…

    I’m definitely guilty of doing this when I was younger but now I’ve realised that if a guy doesn’t love my Britney obsession then he isn’t worthy of my time.


  • First of all how are you 26?! You have the face of a cherub!
    Secondly, I need new people to follow on twitter – my timeline is full of fashion, beauty and selfies. Hook me up Charl! X :)

  • Wait hold up – there’s always one more thing even more entertaining than a good indirect or a desperate girl…
    A good domestic playing out right there on your timeline…

    Haha, sick I know, but I’ve seen some incredible ones in my time!
    Popcorn at the ready.

    Holly Mixtures